Everything!

What’s something you do completely differently from how you were raised?

Swathes of Glory

Where do you start with what’s different?

Travel. I take the car nearly everywhere. We couldn’t afford a car when I was growing up. So, we took the bus or walked. And we were fitter.

Food. My parents grew up when food rationing was still in force. So, they’d learned to use ‘alternatives’ like beef dripping (the fat that came from roasting meat) instead of butter. And my mother liked it with salt added. Now we know that’s a recipe for a heart attack. So, some of us try to eat healthier. Although it’s also interesting to watch other people’s eating habits. You’d swear they’re on a mission to see who can have the first heart attack!

And we used to cook from scratch, not check what’s in the freezer to heat in the microwave. Our freezer was the cold larder room at the side of the house. Milk, delivered every day, and butter were kept cold in there, too. Even so, a lot of food had to be bought fresh, or picked from the garden which is now a lawn.

And that meant much less food waste.

Entertainment. For the first 10 years of my life we didn’t have TV, or electricity, for that matter. When we moved into a new local authority house we got a TV, in black and white. Seeing the latest movies meant a trip to the cinema. Now we have home cinemas in glorious colour,  with live pictures streamed from space.

Clothing. I grew up in the days of hand-me-downs. Today’s fast fashion put paid to that. Some of us still try to use clothes until they fall apart, and repair the favourites. But a lot of people have an annual (or more often) change of wardrobe and the old clothes just go in the bin.

Communication. If we wanted to communicate with anyone we either had to write a letter or go to the nearest phone box. Urgent messages would be sent by telegram. We used to watch Thunderbirds on TV and wish we had one of Jeff Tracy’s wall mounted video phones with the portrait of the person at the other end as a screen saver. I realised, a few years ago, when I was driving home one evening and my friend called me from Sri Lanka where he was working, that we now have them in our pockets. We had a long (hands free voice only) conversation and things that needed to be arranged were arranged in minutes instead of weeks.

Is that enough?

But then, times have changed. Do I long for those days? Not really. There are things I try to replicate, like cooking from fresh ingredients as much as possible, and recycling old clothes. Yet, each era has its own charm and advantages. When I was younger, life expectancy was shorter. Things change. And we have to change with them.

Embrace Uncertainty

How do you deal with uncertainty?

We cannot plan for everything. Therefore, we have to accept that life is uncertain.

Last week, I had my Thursday planned. On Wednesday night I ran over a triangular piece of brick while turning into my street. I heard the thud of air escaping. 100 yards farther along the street, as I parked outside my house, I could tell I had a flat tyre. It was dark, and late, and I went to bed.

Thursday morning, I could see that my plans for the day would have to be changed as I went to get the irreparable tyre replaced.

Was there any point in making a fuss? No. I had no choice but to spend the morning changing the wheel and waiting at the repair shop while my tyre was replaced. It wasn’t money I’d planned on spending. But what choice did I have?

So my son and I changed our plans and still enjoyed ourselves. Why?

Because we embraced the change; we embraced the uncertainty; and we got on with life. It was a challenge, but it was also an experience. It gave me the opportunity to show my son how to change a wheel, something I haven’t done since I can’t remember when. Now, although he hasn’t done the full job, he knows how the process works. It was a learning experience for my son, and an opportunity for me to practice equanimity.

We learned, and we enjoyed. No panic, no histrionics. Just enjoy end journey, embracing the uncertainty.

Growing Up

What’s a moment when you realized you were officially an adult?

Taking my wife into hospital in labour with our first child. It was like a switch was suddenly flicked and the realisation hit that childhood freedoms were gone, and real responsibility had kicked in.

None of us completely give up our childhood ways. But we modify them as we supervise our little ones’ faltering steps as they explore the world that we once inhabited.

Being a Lifelong Learner

Are you a lifelong learner?

Short answer, Yes!

It would be easy to settle back after the years of schooling and simply drift through life relying on the knowledge we gained. Or would it?

Let’s face it, we all learn new things throughout our lives. Otherwise we would never manage. For many retired people that would mean still doing things the way we did them 50 years ago. And for most of us, that doesn’t happen.

But that’s not what this question is about, is it. This is about learning, not just new skills for everyday life like how to use a microwave, or a web-connected dishwasher. This is about new subjects. This is about new careers, even.

Continue reading “Being a Lifelong Learner”

Letting Go

What is your favorite quote?

Letting go of the pain is not about forgetting the past; it’s about remembering the future.