Tag: Balance

No reading regrets

Have you ever regretted reading a book — which one and why?

There may have been books that I started and couldn’t be bothered to finish. Bit I don’t regret any of them.

Well, there was one

I started reading a sample but it wasn’t the sort of book that I like to read. So, I didn’t get the full version. The fact that it turned into a well-known, successful movie is irrelevant. It wasn’t for me. I don’t regret reading some of the sample, and I don’t regret not reading the rest.

The reality is that most of the time, reading the blurb on the back cover will tell you if you’re going to like the book or not. Went would you read something that isn’t your style? Weird.

But what did you learn?

The other aspect of this is what we learn. There’s something to learn from anything you read.

For example, with the sample that I mentioned earlier I learned that I didn’t want to read that book.

It’s also true to say that we often have to read material that we wouldn’t normally choose to. School is a good example of this. We may, far example, not like history. But we read the material even if it’s just to pass the exams. And yet we then refet to that material throughout our lives, in various ways, even if it’s just helping our own children.

No reading regrets

So, do I regret reading any books? No, not at all. They all have something to teach us. We just have to find out what that lesson is.

Each day is precious

If you could relive one year of your life, which one would it be?

This is an impossible choice.

Every year has its good points and every year has its bad points. And reliving them wouldn’t change a thing.

Each day in each year is precious. They shape us, they change us, and they leave us alone. They give us experiences, whether good or bad. And yet, good or bad, they are precious.

Each day so far has made us what we are. And that’s precious. We are what we are because of each and every one of those days.

I wouldn’t want to relive any day, let alone any year. It might change my view of that day, or that year. And maybe then, I wouldn’t be the person I am. And maybe then, I wouldn’t want to relive that year.

No. It’s an impossible choice. Because every day is precious.

Everything!

What’s something you do completely differently from how you were raised?

Swathes of Glory

Where do you start with what’s different?

Travel. I take the car nearly everywhere. We couldn’t afford a car when I was growing up. So, we took the bus or walked. And we were fitter.

Food. My parents grew up when food rationing was still in force. So, they’d learned to use ‘alternatives’ like beef dripping (the fat that came from roasting meat) instead of butter. And my mother liked it with salt added. Now we know that’s a recipe for a heart attack. So, some of us try to eat healthier. Although it’s also interesting to watch other people’s eating habits. You’d swear they’re on a mission to see who can have the first heart attack!

And we used to cook from scratch, not check what’s in the freezer to heat in the microwave. Our freezer was the cold larder room at the side of the house. Milk, delivered every day, and butter were kept cold in there, too. Even so, a lot of food had to be bought fresh, or picked from the garden which is now a lawn.

And that meant much less food waste.

Entertainment. For the first 10 years of my life we didn’t have TV, or electricity, for that matter. When we moved into a new local authority house we got a TV, in black and white. Seeing the latest movies meant a trip to the cinema. Now we have home cinemas in glorious colour,  with live pictures streamed from space.

Clothing. I grew up in the days of hand-me-downs. Today’s fast fashion put paid to that. Some of us still try to use clothes until they fall apart, and repair the favourites. But a lot of people have an annual (or more often) change of wardrobe and the old clothes just go in the bin.

Communication. If we wanted to communicate with anyone we either had to write a letter or go to the nearest phone box. Urgent messages would be sent by telegram. We used to watch Thunderbirds on TV and wish we had one of Jeff Tracy’s wall mounted video phones with the portrait of the person at the other end as a screen saver. I realised, a few years ago, when I was driving home one evening and my friend called me from Sri Lanka where he was working, that we now have them in our pockets. We had a long (hands free voice only) conversation and things that needed to be arranged were arranged in minutes instead of weeks.

Is that enough?

But then, times have changed. Do I long for those days? Not really. There are things I try to replicate, like cooking from fresh ingredients as much as possible, and recycling old clothes. Yet, each era has its own charm and advantages. When I was younger, life expectancy was shorter. Things change. And we have to change with them.

Charity Donations

What’s the best thing you’ve ever found randomly on the street?

Some years ago, a friend told me what his wife does with money she finds on the street, usually being coins of very little individual value, the sort of small change that could never be returned to the original owner.

But my friend was very conscious that she didn’t want to take what belonged to someone else and use it for her own purpose.

She used to pick them up, often single pennies, and keep them in a jar. She did this for a whole year. Then, every year, she would count up what was in the jar, purely out of interest, and donate the whole contents of the jar to charity.

The job you want

If the salary was the same, what job would you be doing right now and why?

I’ve always said that I’d rather have a lower paying job that I enjoy than a higher paying job for which I struggle to get out of bed.

The salary isn’t important. If you don’t like the job, or the people you’re working with, you’ll struggle to get up every morning and eventually the salary will not seem as important and you’ll lose it, anyway.

The reality is that most jobs pay a living wage by law. The real problem isn’t the salary; it’s what we do with the salary. When we overspend, we go looking for a high paying job that we don’t like. Far better to live within the means provided by a lower paying job that we enjoy.

One of the things I’ve learned since I’ve retired is that we waste stress on work. Once we leave, someone else takes over. And they could have taken over long ago if we had left sooner. We are not as irreplaceable as we’d like to think.

So, the salary isn’t the important thing. It’s more about enjoying the life you can afford than striving for the one you can’t.